Scuttlebutt

Blog moved (again)

2009-04-10T20:09:00.002-05:00

It should be the last time. Point your feed reader, or your bookmark, at http://blog.bobbymartin.name. I own the domain (of course) and I installed Wordpress so I can have more control over it.

If I ever decide to move it again, I'll just set up a redirect on my webserver so you don't have to update your bookmark or feedreader again.

I expect to be posting more often, and on more topics, since now you can set up feedreaders just for the topics you're interested in. I tried to keep this one focused on things I thought lots of people would find interesting, not just people who know me, or super-nerds.

Thank you, Holy Taco!

2009-04-06T20:53:00.002-05:00

I saw it.

I giggled.
I chuckled.
I guffawed.
Tears came to my eyes.

This is why the internet was made.

Maybe there's some other cool crap at HolyTaco. I dunno, I saw this and had to post it immediately.

LAZY POST

2009-03-22T16:00:00.000-05:00

http://www.funnyordie.com/blog/posts/14305

READ IT. IT'S DAMN FUNNY.

Calvin & Hobbes makes me happy

2009-03-12T16:26:00.002-05:00

I've been reading recycled Calvin & Hobbes comics and Stumbling for ages. Every once in a while I Stumble across a copy of a C&H that I've read several times before, and I waffle about giving it a thumbs up, but always end up doing it.

Today it paid off. :-)

iPhone Can Make Pictures Talk With Pharce

2009-02-17T08:07:00.002-06:00

^^ Sample video from our iPhone app^^

Tell all your iPhone friends about this new Thing I Did:

Pharce is novelty software that lets iPhone users create mocking, cute, or funny videos from pictures in their iPhoto Library. Such pictures can come from photos the user takes with the iPhone, photographs they "synced" with the iPhone from their computer, or images saved from the web.

Check out the list of videos people have posted to YouTube using the app.

Once the user has selected a picture from their iPhoto Library, they draw a mouth on it and record a soundtrack. Then a blocky Monty Python-esque jaw moves along with the sound to create a movie. The user can add sound effects (including the ubiquitous iPhone fart), animations, and props.

Users can send their videos to non-iphone users, or post it on YouTube!

Use it to have your picture of little Johnny say something cute, make your dog talk, or mock your boss.

Buy it so I can be rich!

BTW, I didn't come up with the original idea or do the art. Thank Frank Jones and Frank Corrieri for that. I did write the damn thing.

Terrorism makes most people stupid

2008-10-21T10:29:00.001-05:00

Don't be most people.

I think I'm going to hell for this one

2008-10-16T23:27:00.001-05:00

Whoever knew Sesame Street was rated X?

SFW, believe it or not.

Is that your index finger, or are you just happy to see me?

2008-10-12T01:45:00.001-05:00

Yeah, my headline doesn't really make sense. It's 2am. The pics are great, though.

My hero

2008-09-30T20:37:00.002-05:00

I don't have the stamina to join him, but I can certainly admire Jon Dyers on his Quest for Every Beard Type.

Is the Pope Catholic?

2008-09-24T09:45:00.002-05:00

READ MORDANT ORANGE. IT IS FUNNY.

Treat Her Right, Fool!

2008-09-17T23:14:00.003-05:00

If you remember the illustrious Mr. T of the mighty A Team, you'll get a kick out of this.

Random pic of the moment

2008-09-15T21:27:00.003-05:00

Thanks, arbitrary guy I stumbledupon!

Sage advice

2008-09-14T18:27:00.001-05:00

Thanks, someecards!

Sam Javanrouh is still the man

2008-08-27T10:24:00.006-05:00

Every morning Daily Dose of Imagery makes my day a little better.

I envy this man

2008-08-26T22:45:00.002-05:00

I envy his experience, and I envy the balls it took to do it.

He hitchhiked around the world. No shit.

Dr Horrible's Sing-along Blog

2008-08-25T23:59:00.006-05:00

With my freeze ray I will stop! the world.
With my freeze ray I will find the time to find the words
to tell you how, how you make me feel
...
It's not a death ray or an ice beam, that's so Johnny Snow
I just think you need time to know...

YOU MUST WATCH THIS SHOW. Warning: the first 5 minutes or so are warm-up. It gets better.

Then it gets great.

Link (or click the pic like always)

Which veep sucks least?

2008-08-24T10:18:00.004-05:00

The Guardian did an inciteful analysis of the obvious candidates for US VP, for both parties.

excerpts:
Pros: Youthful energy signals a change from old corrupt politics to new corrupt politics;
...

Pros: Least likely to die over the next four to eight years; zeal for castration and exorcism meshes nicely with party's innovative 12th century social policy.

(Yes, I know how to spell insightful.)

loliar

2008-08-22T11:17:00.002-05:00

loliar (noun): one who says 'lol' when they are not, in fact, laughing out loud

Delta Screwed Us

2008-08-19T22:42:00.002-05:00

My wife and I decided to take our first vacation without the kids in 13 years. Last month was our 15th anniversary, so we thought it would be nice to spend a week in the US Virgin Islands (a US territory). Delta screwed us.

I have a lot more to say about this, and in a lot more colorful language, but it makes my blood boil just to think about it. I already wrote a letter to Expedia (through whom we bought our tickets), and you can infer the rest of the story from that for now...

We arrived at the DFW airport at about 5:45 on August 9, 2008. We were informed by the Delta agent that we could not fly without our passport. This was contrary to what we had read online about travel to US territories, and we told him so. Our passports were also in the process of being renewed, and we told him that as well.

He was insistent that we needed our passports or our birth certificates to fly, so we left the ticket counter. I called Delta immediately afterwards, and after about 15 minutes they confirmed that we had to have proof of citizenship to fly.

We went home, and that afternoon I called Delta again. This time the people I talked to had no idea that we would need anything beyond the norm for domestic travel. After about 45 minutes on the phone they concluded that we might need our birth certificates, and they changed our itinerary to fly the next day (8/10) at no charge.

On 8/10, we arrived at the airport at about 6am. This time the travel agent read the text to us regarding the necessary documentation - "proof of citizenship PREFERRED". We had lost a day of our vacation because the travel agent of the prior day CHOSE to interpret preferred as required.

We boarded our plane and traveled to ATL. I have two food allergies, to corn and wheat, so there was no real lunch available on the flight that I could eat. Hence we ate lunch in the airport. We made a wrong turn on our way to our gate for flight 327, but made it to the gate by 11:43 am. Our flight's departure was scheduled for 11:51 am.

When we arrived (again, at 11:43 am), the gate was closed and unmanned, and our flight was to all appearances departed. We knocked on the door and looked for an attendant. Finally someone came to the counter, but they insisted that we talk to someone at the service desk; they couldn't help us.

I went to the Delta service desk, and at this point I was livid. I spoke to the attendant (Regina P) and explained our problem. She smirked and said that we had to be at the gate 10 minutes before the plane left, and that this was documented on their web site (which I didn't visit, and I don't believe I'm obligated to read their entire website to fly, anyway) and on an insert which they USED TO put with the tickets.

We asked to speak to her supervisor. A woman at the desk who had been listening (Anita or Alita Roebuck) said she was the supervisor, and said she wouldn't help us either. We would have to PAY for an itinerary change. I raised my voice (I didn't shout, but I did raise my voice) and told her I wouldn't be paying Delta any more money. Marvin M, who was also at the service desk, at this point said he would call the police if I didn't calm down. I asked if he was going to call the police on me because my voice was raised, and he said yes.

I asked if they were going to do anything to help us, and they again told us we would have to pay to change the itinerary, and that it was our fault we missed the plane since we weren't there 10 minutes prior to the time listed on our ticket. I repeated that I would not be paying Delta any more money and left.

In short, we lost one day of our vacation because a Delta agent decided that we must have proof of citizenship, when the law, and apparently their policy, only indicated that proof of citizenship was preferred. We lost another day of our vacation, and were told we would have to pay for the privilege of flying the next day, when we arrived at the gate 7 minutes prior to any information we had available to us would indicate we needed to be there. It should have been obvious that we intended to board the plane - we were merely at a stopover; their records at the gate should have indicated that we were in transit and missing from the roster.

We did not receive what we paid for, and it was entirely at Delta's discretion that our travel plans were thwarted. I should insist on reimbursement for the rental car we used to get from Atlanta, where they stranded us, back home. However, all I do insist on is to be reimbursed for the travel we paid for, and which was denied us.

The amount of that reimbursement is $1,356.98.

I appreciate your prompt reply.

Thanks,
Bobby Martin

Wha wha wha?

2008-08-16T23:11:00.001-05:00

Not his day.

2008-07-18T22:32:00.002-05:00

Stumbleupon yet again manages to yank a literal lol from me.

Short but sweet

2008-07-09T23:20:00.002-05:00

What happens in the Matrix, stays in the Matrix.

Never gonna give, never gonna give

2008-07-05T11:37:00.001-05:00

Lots more statistics of things you already know

Thank you, StumbleUpon!

The toughest target you'll ever track...

2008-06-09T23:45:00.002-05:00

Where the fuck is Waldo?

Coming soon to a theater near you. (Well, probably not).

Read at work

2008-05-30T23:50:00.002-05:00

Read books and look like you're working.

Whether you want to read books or not, you have to click through, then click on the NZ Book Council Guest icon. Crazy!

This is kind of scary. It seems like something similar could easily trick a lot of people into installing evil things on their PC.

Of course, receiving an email with an attachment named "OMG look how far she gets it in!.exe" is probably enough to trick most of those people into installing evil things...

Lightning Storm During Volcanic Eruption

2008-05-23T21:37:00.004-05:00

I have nothing pithy to say; it was just an awe-inspiring picture.

The motherload

2008-05-23T16:42:00.002-05:00

So, Weezer made this great video: http://www.boingboing.net/2008/05/23/weezer-video-stars-l.html

I loved it, but the real gem comes from the comment thread on BoingBoing...

So if you really care, or are really bored, here they are:

I take no credit for compiling this whatsoever. I'm a dork, admittedly, but not totally insane. I stole it from Digg where some other guy stole it from somewhere else, or something.

Thanks a million, WINGO on BoingBoing!

Best Gay Wookie Ad Evar

2008-05-22T15:06:00.003-05:00

I found this ad on Sinfest, one of my favorite webcomics. I haven't even clicked through, so don't blame me if the other end of that link is the next Lovecraftian horror in the sequence that starts {goatse, tubgirl, 2 girls one cup, ...}

Yeah, yeah

2008-04-04T09:37:00.001-05:00

I haven't posted in forever. No one reads this any more 'cause there's never anything new here.

Scan bash.org for goodies like the following:

#854899

i was peeing on the building and a cop rolls up on his bike
i told him, i hope you're not going to arrest me cuz i don't think ill be able to sit on the handlebars
i almost went to jail for that

#854608

sterano: Whats the difference between Raid_0 and Raid_1?
Steve: In Raid_0 the zero stands for how many files you are going to get back if something goes wrong.

Lazy blogger

2008-02-22T11:09:00.002-06:00

I have been a lazy blogger. Work (at Southwest Airlines), my online sale site Frimp.net, MoochMuch, cruising the web, reading books, three kids and a wife apparently don't leave me enough time left over to really maintain a blog.

However, you can see all the fun stuff I plan to put on the blog with the RSS feed from my del.icio.us items I tagged to blog. This is the same stuff that would have shown up on my blog (and theoretically will show up eventually), just without the pic and lame commentary.

Gorgeous Tiny Chicken Machine Show

2008-02-09T00:26:00.000-06:00

Holy crap, you have to watch Gorgeous Tiny Chicken Machine Show

(sound, video, hilarity)

Likewise this McDonald's mash up/epileptic fit totally deserves it's own post, but I'm totally too lazy and tired to give it one.

Skip the glasses

2008-02-07T11:22:00.000-06:00

In my last post, I talked about a networked wearable system to give you a virtual phone, gps, etc. and I mentioned VR glasses.

It looks as if technology outstripped my expectations... I guess we'll be jumping straight to contact lenses with embedded displays.

Teh future

2008-01-25T13:57:00.000-06:00

BoingBoing Gadgets has a post about a concept device that is the iPhone on steroids - basically, a brick wrapped in touch sensitive ePaper.

Not having looked at the demo (I'm at work and they're picky about some things...) I'll say that the device is out of date.

Clearly the Next Big Thing has to be for the device to go away altogether. I know the basic idea for wearables has been around forever, but it seems to me that the time has come.

I wanna wear a bluetooth earpiece and cool shades, possibly with [ here's where my imagination is failing me :-( ] gloves, or fingerless gloves, or (ew) wristbands, and let any surface, including my hand, or no surface, be my interface. Tap the earpiece when you get a phone call, see a dial pad on your palm and tap out the number with the other hand, watch movies on a giant screen hovering in the air...

(equipment list: bluetooth earpiece, some brick in my pocket or on my belt, glasses w/ minute camera, painted video display, & variable darkness lenses, and gloves)

Why the hell do I want to dig out a device every time I want mindless entertainment or superficial conversation?

Ideally, you could then sell any little doohickey with whatever interface you want (switches, knobs, g-spots, ...) and all it needs to do is network with some software on the brick to be anything at all...

Fun web images trick

2007-11-25T20:43:00.000-06:00

Go to any page with a number of images on it, e.g. this Google image search

Then paste the following into the URL bar:
javascript:R=0; x1=.1; y1=.05; x2=.25; y2=.24; x3=1.6; y3=.24; x4=300; y4=200; x5=300; y5=200; DI= document.images; DIL=DI.length; function A(){for(i=0; i < DIL; i++){DIS=DI[ i ].style; DIS.position='absolute'; DIS.left=Math.sin(R*x1+i*x2+x3)*x4+x5; DIS.top=Math.cos(R*y1+i*y2+y3)*y4+y5}R++}setInterval('A()',5 ); void(0)

If you know javascript, you can play around with the code for other effects.

Thanks, Redtophank, whoever the hell you are!

Funnies galore

2007-11-19T10:57:00.000-06:00

My friend John Munsch (who happens to be an excellent web developer and the owner of lol.com) just put up a new & improved version of his site.

Prepare to be amused!

More funnies from irc

2007-11-19T10:55:00.000-06:00

Inflames: Dude, my sister had sex with some guy 15 minutes before he was 18.  Then she called me and told me.
Inflames: I was like, wtf? I don't wanna know that.
Sandman: wow
Sandman: She doing anything February 17th at 11:45pm?

http://bash.org/?823861

From bash. For more funnies, read the latest, or check out the top 100.

Redefining willpower

2007-09-11T15:26:00.000-05:00

Peng Shulin has taught himself to walk again, with the help of some heavy duty prosthetics, after losing the entire lower half of his body.

Man, I don't even have the oomph keep my lawn mowed...

Netflix for books

2007-09-11T15:24:00.001-05:00

Rent books (including audiobooks) at Booksfree.com

Conversational Italian, here I come!

Culture shock

2007-09-10T14:10:00.000-05:00

Want to learn about the strange things that are par for the course in other cultures?

Try reading one of their phrasebooks.

Excerpts:

Russian: I want a specimen of your urine.
Hindi: Do you practice safe sex?
Portuguese: Must I swallow them whole?

The Day the Highway Maintenance Crew Stood Still

2007-09-10T13:46:00.000-05:00

Do you ever get tired of the highway crew leaving road hazard signs up long after the work is done? So did this guy.

Random pic of the moment

2007-05-24T11:34:00.000-05:00

Veni, vidi, vici

2007-05-23T15:11:00.000-05:00

I stumbled
I read
I peed my pants

Holy Shit! A talking chicken!

Love the bash.org

2007-05-16T10:13:00.000-05:00

<kow|wk> so
<kow|wk> worth noting
<kow|wk> running "reboot -h" does NOT produce a helpful usage message

from Bash.org, of course

Looking for a job

2007-05-03T13:00:00.000-05:00

My contract is coming to an end at my current location, so I'm starting up the job search process.

I have a couple of leads, but more is always good. Here's my resume.

If you know someone in the Dallas/Fort Worth area who needs an architect, tech lead or senior developer for a Java or C++ application (I have python skills too, see the TurboGears site I built), please forward me on to them. I can work well as a part of a team, lead a team to success using agile processes, or build applications completely independently.

My rates are high. I am open to full time salaried work, but only if I can get a salary comparable to my 1099 rate or the work is just fantastic.

I am interested in relocating overseas (primarily England or near Geneva, Switzerland) but I only have mediocre Spanish and crappy German in the way of foriegn language skills.

Great dangling duck dicks, Batman!

2007-05-01T15:02:00.000-05:00

Apparently several species of duck, including Meller's duck from Madagascar and an Argentine duck, have gotten into a reproductive evolutionary war with their sex organs. They start growing a phallus at the beginning of the mating season, and it grows (up to longer than the duck itself) through the rest of the season.

Read the NYT article on duck dicks.

Thanks, Boing Boing!

Moving

2007-05-01T14:04:00.000-05:00

I don't have a picture for this, but this poem, or essay, or whatever it is really moved me.

Family Condoms

2007-04-11T10:39:00.000-05:00

The image says it all...

Now ISO 9001 compliant!

Charles Stross - the new Neal Stephenson

2007-04-02T20:31:00.000-05:00

So, I was really disappointed when Neal Stephenson stopped writing that awesome cyberpunk (I hate the genre name but tend to love the actual books) and started writing those steampunk books. I've been moping around and reading other stuff, but I finally found a replacement...

Charles Stross writes amazing hard SF set from 20 to 500 years in the future.

He has a bunch of stuff (and a bunch of other stuff) online for you to read for free, and a ton of great stuff you can buy in stores. In particular, I recommend Iron Sunrise, Singularity Sky, and Glasshouse (which I just finished and loved).

Amusing anecdote: I just discovered that he invented the Githyanki, one of my favorite D&D monsters. I thought I would mention that to Deb, my wife. The conversation went like this:

Bobby: Do you know what a githyanki is?

Debbie: The name of Don Quixote's burro?

Which I, at least, thought was amusing...

Dream come true

2007-04-02T17:27:00.000-05:00

Buy a human sized (7') hamster ball from Target for 200 bucks.

Dangerous = fun

2007-04-02T17:21:00.000-05:00

What better way to burn down your house than making cool glowing plasma in your microwave with nothing but a grape and a glass?

Here's the video how-to.

Belated Valentine Wishes

2007-02-23T14:21:00.000-06:00

Roses are #FF0000,
Violets are #0000FF,
All my base
Are belong to you.

Always read the fine print

2007-02-10T16:31:00.000-06:00

Only one faster production auto in the world - and it's electric!

2007-02-07T20:34:00.000-06:00

The X1 has a 0-60 time that only one production model car beats - the Bugatti Veyron.

The shocking thing is that the X1 is all electric! The inventor claims they'll be selling a small production run for about $100,000 each.

I want one!

Twist it from pansy to he-man

2007-02-07T20:23:00.000-06:00

You can twist the top on this hot sauce to adjust it from mild to super-spicy.

It also comes with pump action.

Must See TV

2006-11-22T14:54:00.000-06:00

National Geographic is running a documentary (hmm, in some ways a doucheumentary) about the birth process in animals, In the Womb: Animals.

They use 3D ultrasound and little cameras stuck in very uncomfortable places to document firsthand the process from conception (eww!) to birth (awww.).

Watch it!

My new site

2006-11-06T20:28:00.000-06:00

I finally have a first fully working version of my new site online. It's MoochMuch, and it helps you find & bum cool stuff from your friends, track which friend has what, and reminds you & your friends to return stuff.

Sign up, list some stuff, and tell some of your mooching friends so you can make sure you get your crap back. I've already found five or six things I forgot I had loaned out since I told my friends about it, and now I don't have to remember who has what.

More from Bash.org

2006-10-09T09:57:00.000-05:00

I'm sorry it's been so long since I've posted! I've been taking some family time, some hobby time [ geek out: my wizard hit 9th level ;-) ] , and working on MoochMuch.

Anyway, here are more funnies from Bash:

<goat25> what is the volume of a pizza of radius z and thickness a ?
<goat25> answer: pi z z a
-----------------------------
<w-ll-am> well its nearly working
<boltbait> You are aware, code that ALMOST works looks NOTHING like the code that ACTUALLY works.
<w-ll-am> dont tell me that, its due tomorrow
-----------------------------

objets d'mud

2006-08-18T22:10:00.000-05:00

Believe it or not, this beautiful ball was made with nothing more than mud and a cloth, and it can be done by children.

Click the pic for a small gallery of other gorgeous mud balls. You can also read a bit about what William Gibson had to say about mud balls, or read how to make a mud ball yourself. (See the bottom of the article).

Homopolar motor

2006-08-07T21:37:00.000-05:00

Make a 10,000 rpm motor in less than a minute using only one drywall screw, one 1.5 V alkaline cell, six inches of plain copper wire, and one small neodymium disk magnet. (Any metallic magnet which has a north pole on one flat face and the south on the other will do.)

Wow.

If your role playing isn't addictive enough...

2006-08-02T20:09:00.000-05:00

These guys have about a hundred RPG motivational posters.

Darth Kitty

2006-07-31T21:08:00.000-05:00

Or maybe it's Hello Vader. Either way, very cool.

Unfortunately, it's a photoshop job. Quick, somebody mass produce these - I wanna be one for Halloween this year!

Thanks, BoingBoing

Ceci n'est pas un little old lady

2006-07-25T20:28:00.000-05:00

This is not a little old lady. It is a 3 ft tall statue that Ron Mueck did! You can see lots more of his utterly fascinating giant and miniature human statues (that look completely lifelike) on this crazyrussian page.

Oh yeah, there are representations of nekkid people on there, so workers beware.

Level 1 Human

2006-07-21T23:01:00.000-05:00

Label your little human with his vital statistics. You can buy the creeper on Jinx.

Meanwhile, the pic links you to "M Kristian"'s image directory. There are several other cool pics there, but watch out - a few are sexually explicit.

If you don't have headphones...

2006-07-18T22:13:00.000-05:00

Make some from crap you find in the trash.

Giant frikken catfish

2006-07-18T21:52:00.000-05:00

Apparently, some Thai fishermen have finally stopped fishing for the critically endangered giant frikken catfish in honor of the Thai king's 60th year on the throne.

Online time-wasters

2006-07-13T09:23:00.000-05:00

A good friend of mine put some excellent games online. What makes it really nice is that it's all javascript, so it responds very smoothly and you can just save the webpage to play while you're disconnected.

He has Sudoku, Mastermind, and Cryptopuzzles. I haven't looked in too much depth at his Sudoku (I don't play) or his Mastermind (I just haven't gotten time yet), but the Cryptopuzzle implementation is the best I've seen.

You can see all of the games at http://mysite.verizon.net/ned/

Thanks again, Ned!

More plasma fun, in your own home

2006-07-11T23:17:00.000-05:00

Grapes + microwave = dangerous fun

Thanks, Ned!

The zen master asks:

2006-07-11T23:09:00.000-05:00

What is the sound of 3.2 million firecrackers attached to one fuse?

Answer:
t"/>

Thanks, Ned!

Whoops!

2006-07-11T13:43:00.000-05:00

I forgot to put the link in for the 'heavenly coffee' post.

I also updated the pic to properly link.

Hey! You look like a real jerk!

2006-07-10T19:01:00.000-05:00

Apparently, that's what you hear right before a gigantic hand swoops from the heavens to plop you into a deadly 8 bit racing game.

Playing with electricity is fun!

2006-07-10T00:26:00.000-05:00

I wish I had a giant Tesla coil.

Sweet, heavenly coffee

2006-07-09T23:55:00.000-05:00

Maybe if you drink Folgers, you too can be visited by softly glowing hordes of levitating people with vacant, cult-like gazes.

Frist p0st!

2006-07-05T00:08:00.000-05:00

Yeah, I don't have any content for this one. Just checking out the new blog spot...

You can see my older blog entries at http://wurp.livejournal.com/.

I have a backup that I'll put online if they take the old one down. Drop a comment here if that happens and I'll take care of it.